One year ago today Joe and I boarded a plane for the adventure of our lives. For me it was the first time I had ever lived more than 20-25 miles from my birthplace. For Joe, a civil service brat, it was the first time in over 30 years he had lived abroad. It’s safe to say that Joe and I were both looking for a new adventure in our lives and China seemed to be it. Silly me, I thought it was going to be a new house somewhere else in the metroplex and a new Lexus!
I can honestly say I have grown in ways I never thought possible in this past year. I never thought I could live a great distance from family. I certainly didn’t think I could live half a world away. I never thought I could live without the daily contact with my family and friends. Distance has proven that these bonds can become tighter and absence really does make you appreciate your loved ones.
This year has shown me a world that I could only imagine but never thought I would want to experience, much less actually live in. China and its people are simply amazing. Aside from the ugly China the world sees from the outside, experiencing this country firsthand has been a growing experience for me. China is certainly proud of its culture, as well as the natural beauty of the country itself. There are some of the most beautiful places still in their natural state that we hope we can experience in the time we are here.
I have met some wonderful people on this adventure. Joe and I have met a lot of couples our age that are experiencing the same things we are. Many are veteran expats who have lived abroad for years but there are also many experiencing what we are for the first time. It has been good for us to find people we can bond with and experience this amazing country together. We have a regular meeting place, Peter’s Tex Mex, where we can get decent margaritas and some of the city’s best western food. It’s kind of like an expat’s Cheers (where everyone knows your name!). It’s a great place for Friday and Saturday night gathering. We have found the most amazing church and have enjoyed experiencing God’s praise with people from all over the world who share our same beliefs.
The Chinese people are the most gracious people you could ever meet. They are very eager to talk with you, especially to practice their English. The young people seem the most receptive to us; the older generations seem a little more guarded in their approach. I love the little children and their beautiful innocence.
I can honestly say I have never felt safer than I do here in China, whether it’s in my home, neighborhood or out and about in the city. Once you get past the fact that you are in a communist country, you realize that life here is not much different than back home. Your greatest fear becomes learning how to walk the streets and cross at the intersections.
Things that I miss here are mostly material. I totally miss my car and the mobility that having one at your disposal provides. It’s sometimes frustrating that you have to so carefully plan your days and outings around someone else driving and depending on someone to be there for you. Joe and I have been very fortunate to have a wonderful driver in Tom. He even seems to look out for me. Sometimes I don’t think he really trusts that I can function totally on my own!
I miss my American TV and I miss my American grocery stores. The satellite is hit and miss, more miss these days. Thanks to Slingbox I have been able to stay up with some of my favorite shows through my computer. Food shopping here is an enormous challenge and a daily battle. Don’t even get me started on foods that I miss and crave but will probably NEVER see here. I will say I have gotten better at finding what I need (sometimes at a great cost for imported items). Cooking has become one thing that I feel I can do for Joe and me that reminds us most of home. I miss being able to shop for clothes. People my size definitely do not have many clothes options here in Chengdu and for the most part things aren’t much better in Beijing or Shanghai either.
Joe travels most weeks at least one or two nights. I’ve always been a homebody and I will admit there are some days when I just don’t venture out. As long as I have a good book (which I almost always have) or something entertaining to watch I’m usually good. I have my regular things I do: Chinese lessons on Thursdays, Mahjong on Fridays, luncheons with friends, “field trips” with friends to see surrounding local sites, nail appointments, and the occasional foot massage. Yes, the life of an expat wife is absolutely grueling! I do travel with Joe sometimes, but lately his work has kept him busy with day meetings and night business dinners.
What I have missed most about being here is the events that I have missed back home. I was able to be home for Talon’s birthday last September, but missed Paul’s birthday in October. We were able to be home for the holidays and celebrate Joe’s birthday as a family, but I missed my Mom’s and Dad’s birthdays this year as well as Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. I was able to be home for Jay’s and Ashley’s wedding showers and of course the wedding celebration, but I missed Ashley’s birthday, Ashley’s college graduation and Jay’s birthday. I missed Candice’s birthday in May. Just this past week I was unable to be with Kelli on her birthday and I will miss Doug’s birthday at the end of the month. This may seem small but these events are all times when we do things as a family and the times that we are all together. Talon is suddenly growing up so fast that I feel like I am missing huge chunks of his life.
I have been fortunate to go home about every three months and that has helped. For Joe it has been harder since he is required to stay out of the country for 330 days his first year. This next week he will pass that milestone and will be much freer in being able to go back home. I have noticed that our move and these last few years of traveling for Joe have changed him and how he deals with being away from the family and me. He is much more in touch with his feelings and how he deals with even being apart from me for even one night. Sometimes I feel like I am now the stronger one. Kelli’s Father’s Day blog even brought him to tears!
Joe and I have definitely rediscovered each other in this past year together. Being just the two of us has brought us back together in ways we haven’t experienced in a very long time. It may sound selfish but I have really appreciated the alone time and the “us” time we are now having with each other. Our experiences in discovering new places together have made lifetime memories and we will always look back on this time as a highpoint in our lives together.
We haven’t had the opportunity to share our new home with many people but hope to more in the coming year. Kelli and Doug had an amazing experience here with us back in November. In August we will be able to show our new home to Wade when he comes to China for the first of what we hope will be many more trips to China. Mom and Dad are waiting for their passports and we hope to get them here early next year. Joe’s stepmother, Susan, will probably come in the fall. We hope to get Jay and Ashley as well as Paul, Candice and Talon here soon. Our home is open to any and all who want come to experience this wonderful country.
As we start our second year here in China, I can truly say that this is now our home and we are comfortable and happy here. We plan to take advantage of the this experience we are having and hope to see as much as we can in the time we have left. This is our time and we will make as many memories as we can before going back to the “real world”. We celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary in September. We had originally planned to celebrate in Austrailia but have since decided that we need to be home during that time. Austrailia will still be there in March when we hope to go. Right now, home is where we want to be, with family.
Happy Birthday Princess! We love you!
Love to all!
I can honestly say I have grown in ways I never thought possible in this past year. I never thought I could live a great distance from family. I certainly didn’t think I could live half a world away. I never thought I could live without the daily contact with my family and friends. Distance has proven that these bonds can become tighter and absence really does make you appreciate your loved ones.
This year has shown me a world that I could only imagine but never thought I would want to experience, much less actually live in. China and its people are simply amazing. Aside from the ugly China the world sees from the outside, experiencing this country firsthand has been a growing experience for me. China is certainly proud of its culture, as well as the natural beauty of the country itself. There are some of the most beautiful places still in their natural state that we hope we can experience in the time we are here.
I have met some wonderful people on this adventure. Joe and I have met a lot of couples our age that are experiencing the same things we are. Many are veteran expats who have lived abroad for years but there are also many experiencing what we are for the first time. It has been good for us to find people we can bond with and experience this amazing country together. We have a regular meeting place, Peter’s Tex Mex, where we can get decent margaritas and some of the city’s best western food. It’s kind of like an expat’s Cheers (where everyone knows your name!). It’s a great place for Friday and Saturday night gathering. We have found the most amazing church and have enjoyed experiencing God’s praise with people from all over the world who share our same beliefs.
The Chinese people are the most gracious people you could ever meet. They are very eager to talk with you, especially to practice their English. The young people seem the most receptive to us; the older generations seem a little more guarded in their approach. I love the little children and their beautiful innocence.
I can honestly say I have never felt safer than I do here in China, whether it’s in my home, neighborhood or out and about in the city. Once you get past the fact that you are in a communist country, you realize that life here is not much different than back home. Your greatest fear becomes learning how to walk the streets and cross at the intersections.
Things that I miss here are mostly material. I totally miss my car and the mobility that having one at your disposal provides. It’s sometimes frustrating that you have to so carefully plan your days and outings around someone else driving and depending on someone to be there for you. Joe and I have been very fortunate to have a wonderful driver in Tom. He even seems to look out for me. Sometimes I don’t think he really trusts that I can function totally on my own!
I miss my American TV and I miss my American grocery stores. The satellite is hit and miss, more miss these days. Thanks to Slingbox I have been able to stay up with some of my favorite shows through my computer. Food shopping here is an enormous challenge and a daily battle. Don’t even get me started on foods that I miss and crave but will probably NEVER see here. I will say I have gotten better at finding what I need (sometimes at a great cost for imported items). Cooking has become one thing that I feel I can do for Joe and me that reminds us most of home. I miss being able to shop for clothes. People my size definitely do not have many clothes options here in Chengdu and for the most part things aren’t much better in Beijing or Shanghai either.
Joe travels most weeks at least one or two nights. I’ve always been a homebody and I will admit there are some days when I just don’t venture out. As long as I have a good book (which I almost always have) or something entertaining to watch I’m usually good. I have my regular things I do: Chinese lessons on Thursdays, Mahjong on Fridays, luncheons with friends, “field trips” with friends to see surrounding local sites, nail appointments, and the occasional foot massage. Yes, the life of an expat wife is absolutely grueling! I do travel with Joe sometimes, but lately his work has kept him busy with day meetings and night business dinners.
What I have missed most about being here is the events that I have missed back home. I was able to be home for Talon’s birthday last September, but missed Paul’s birthday in October. We were able to be home for the holidays and celebrate Joe’s birthday as a family, but I missed my Mom’s and Dad’s birthdays this year as well as Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. I was able to be home for Jay’s and Ashley’s wedding showers and of course the wedding celebration, but I missed Ashley’s birthday, Ashley’s college graduation and Jay’s birthday. I missed Candice’s birthday in May. Just this past week I was unable to be with Kelli on her birthday and I will miss Doug’s birthday at the end of the month. This may seem small but these events are all times when we do things as a family and the times that we are all together. Talon is suddenly growing up so fast that I feel like I am missing huge chunks of his life.
I have been fortunate to go home about every three months and that has helped. For Joe it has been harder since he is required to stay out of the country for 330 days his first year. This next week he will pass that milestone and will be much freer in being able to go back home. I have noticed that our move and these last few years of traveling for Joe have changed him and how he deals with being away from the family and me. He is much more in touch with his feelings and how he deals with even being apart from me for even one night. Sometimes I feel like I am now the stronger one. Kelli’s Father’s Day blog even brought him to tears!
Joe and I have definitely rediscovered each other in this past year together. Being just the two of us has brought us back together in ways we haven’t experienced in a very long time. It may sound selfish but I have really appreciated the alone time and the “us” time we are now having with each other. Our experiences in discovering new places together have made lifetime memories and we will always look back on this time as a highpoint in our lives together.
We haven’t had the opportunity to share our new home with many people but hope to more in the coming year. Kelli and Doug had an amazing experience here with us back in November. In August we will be able to show our new home to Wade when he comes to China for the first of what we hope will be many more trips to China. Mom and Dad are waiting for their passports and we hope to get them here early next year. Joe’s stepmother, Susan, will probably come in the fall. We hope to get Jay and Ashley as well as Paul, Candice and Talon here soon. Our home is open to any and all who want come to experience this wonderful country.
As we start our second year here in China, I can truly say that this is now our home and we are comfortable and happy here. We plan to take advantage of the this experience we are having and hope to see as much as we can in the time we have left. This is our time and we will make as many memories as we can before going back to the “real world”. We celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary in September. We had originally planned to celebrate in Austrailia but have since decided that we need to be home during that time. Austrailia will still be there in March when we hope to go. Right now, home is where we want to be, with family.
Happy Birthday Princess! We love you!
Love to all!
2 comments:
I'm not sure why... but your post made me tear up at the end. I guess I am just so excited to know ya'll are coming back in September. Thinking about waiting till December was almost too much to take in. When you write it all down I realize how much you have experienced and how much you have had to miss because of it.
Regardless, everyone should be able to tell how happy you two are. I love that I have parents still as in love as the day they married. If moving to China brought you even closer, then God Bless, China! Can't wait to see you again :) Love and miss ya lots!!!!
Shoot........You aren't even my mother and this made me tear up at then end too. You are very lucky to be able to experience this wonderful adventure. I know how much everyone here misses you, but know too that you are making memories of a lifetime and I don't think anyone begrudges you that. Please continue sharing your adventures with all of us. We sure do enjoy reading your blog.
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